Follow my journey from being overweight and addicted to ice cream, to running marathon's!

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Bad news from the Dr.

For the first time since receiving my diagnosis of a torn peroneal tendon, I saw the ortho Dr today.
He walked in the room and said "you have a real problem".

He showed me the MRI pics, and where a normal tendon would be a black line, mine was white and frayed. Then he showed me a different pic where there was supposed to be a black circle (not sure where exactly that was), and it looked like a smushed semi circle.

He wants me to wear this lovely boot for 6 weeks.
After that, he'll see how I'm feeling. He said some people opt not to have surgery, because it's manageable. But it will never heal on its own. I already know I'd rather have surgery then risk having flare ups or going through this again. After surgery I will not be able to run for a few months.
 He said it is caused by overuse, but I don't run nearly as much as some people I know!!

 So, he said my running season is over. I most likely won't run again until next year.

I am having a very hard time with this. I started crying in the Dr.'s office, and haven't stopped yet.

Running is MY thing. Running is who I am. I don't get to be a Mom, so running is my baby! I'm mad! Can't I have something I love? Why does everything have to be taken from me?

Ok. I'm going to try to think positive. I know lots of people have/had injuries and had to take time off. Some of you guys have shared your stories with me. So I know if other people can get through it, I can too.

One good thing is I bought a bike and have been biking. I love it. Thankfully I can do that, I am glad to be able to do something.

 I have no doubt that I will run again. I will run marathons again. This may be taken from me for now, but you better believe I will get it back.

Now I'm off to cancel the 3 marathons I had scheduled for this fall. Ahhh the tears!! 


katie




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41 comments

  1. Tears for you my sweet friend... I know this is tough, but I urge you to find comfort in the Lord. I pray for your healing. I am glad that you are able to bike! Can you take up swimming?! Not sure with your foot if that would be an issue, but maybe by the time you can start running again, you can do a triathlon with all of your biking and swimming experience!

    It's okay to cry. Let the tears go! Do not hold it in! It's okay to mourn for your lost running season and races. But know that when the time comes for you to be back at it, you'll have a ton of people here to cheer you on! Just take time to heal and grow closer to God!

    I love you!

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    1. Yes, I can swim and bike. You're absolutely right, I just may start doing tri's when this is all over! Thank you so much Carie, you are so sweet. Hey, let's run a marathon together next year, ok? Love you much!!

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  2. Oh no, Katie!! So sorry to hear this. Take care of yourself. Sending you healing thoughts. You're a fighter, so I know you'll be a runner again one day.

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  3. I am so sorry Katie!!!
    I totally feel your pain, in more ways than one! I am single and like you Running was/is my thing, as others chatted about their families, kids, I would at least have running to talk about.
    I had to wear the boot for 8 weeks, and I did have some good news after that. My only tip is, wear it as much as possible, like 23.5 hours a day. He may have told you this, but during the night is one of the most important healing times, that is when the tendons are the most relaxed!
    I hope you don't have to have surgery, but I have a good friend locally who opted for that route, and just had her surgery a week ago. In all, she may have made the smarter decision because she'll be healed and back to running in far less time than I was. It's a tough decision, but hopefully in the next 6 weeks some major healing will happen!! I'll be keeping you in my thoughts!
    A tip, that I wished I had done but didn't. If I had quit standing and walking so much on my foot while in the boot I would have healed faster, that is my only regret on my recovery.
    It's not always caused by an overuse thing, it took 3 specialists to realize I had injured mine from standing/walking on my feet too long in flat shoes, and it only took a few times in those flats to cause the problem. I curse flat or minimalist, low drop shoes now! I'll be rooting for you and fast healing, and if you ever need to talk, or want to know more details on what they had me do during/after the boot, you can totally reach out to me anytime!!!
    Go ahead and cry, don't hold it in. Tear can be a good comfort for a while!

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    1. I guess I'm glad to hear you say to wear my boot all the time. The dr told me the same thing, but honestly I thought well, I'll just wear it when it's convenient. So to hear you say that, makes me think maybe I should!
      I am really wondering if wearing my minimalist shoes caused this! I've already decided never again. I just don't want to take that chance again, just in case that was it. Thank you SO much for all of your advice and encouragement through all this. I've know you've been through it all! xoxo

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    2. Katie - I just read this and I thought the same thing!! I started running barefoot on the treadmill last fall- it felt WONDERFUL! I felt like I could run forever!! And while I already had the start of the injury and a predisposition (something called a low-lying muscle belly, where the peroneal muscle doesn't allow the tendon to sit in the groove and causes it to sublux or continually dislocate), running barefoot made the tear so much worse. At least your boot is cool! Mine was black and ugly and went up to my KNEE! Ugh I can't tell you how many times I cried... keeping good thoughts for you! <3 <3 ~ Sue

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    3. That's interesting that running barefoot made your injury worse. That even convinces me more that it was because of my minimal shoes! I want to cry every time I see someone running! Thanks Sue! ♥

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  4. Oh my goodness I am so sorry. I am thinking of you.

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    1. Thank you Abby! I keep thinking of you and your "come better", and how you had to cancel some races too. Your comeback encourages me that I will too.

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  5. My heart is breaking for you! I know exactly what it feels like to be so attached to running. On the bright side, I'd just like to say welcome to triathlon, the sport of once-injured runners ;) Now that you have the bike, it's pretty much inevitable!

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    1. Omg Tracy, that made me laugh! You're right, it's inevitable!! Thanks girl!

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    3. It's true! I got my first road bike when I was on running hiatus due to injury. "Maybe one day I'll do a triathlon," I said. A year after that, I had done 5 with no intentions of stopping!

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  6. I'm so sorry you're going through this. But I'm glad by the end of this post you said what you said — you WILL run again! Just not right now, and not until your body wants you to. You only get one, and it's important to listen and take care of it. I can't imagine how frustrating this must be, but I know you'll get through it. With the help of your bike and maybe, as Tracy mentioned, maybe the help of some water too ;)

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    1. Thank you so much Alyssa. I'm sure I'll be doing lots of biking and swimming now, I'm thankful I can still do something!!

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  7. I am really sorry to hear about this. But, I am happy that you can bike.
    I am sure you will do many marathons once this hard time is over.
    We all get tested in our own ways...so just hang in there and keep the faith.

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    1. I can't wait to do lots of marathons next year. Thank you! (Btw, love that you have twins, I have a twin sister. Best thing ever!!)

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  8. Oh no, I am so sorry! That's such a bummer--I can't even imagine how you must be feeling right now. Remember that you are many other things besides a runner! I hope you can find a cross training activity that you love until you're able to run again. Sending positive thoughts your way!

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  9. Oh, Katie, I am so sorry! It sounds like with the surgery you will be able to run again though it will just be awhile, right? I feel for you! I completely understand the concept of running being your 'thing'. I don't get to have kids either (I'm a stepmom as well) and so running is my item.

    Biking will be great cross training to keep you ready for when you get the green light to run again. You can do it! I am pulling for you!

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    1. Yes, I'll definitely be able to run again, just not for awhile.
      I'm sorry you deal with that too. I feel like while everyone is Ooooh-ing and ahhh-ing over everyone else's cute kids, at least I have my running to talk about! I guess that's why now I feel a little stranded. But I will get through it. Thanks so much girl!

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  10. I'm so sorry :( I totally get where you're coming from....

    I'm just glad you caught it now before you did permanent damage!!!
    You're going to come out of the STRONGER & WISER - I lay money on it :)

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    1. I'm really glad I caught it in time too, and that it won't be this way forever. Thank you so much friend. ♥

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  11. oh honey, i am so sorry. there are no words! big hugs xo

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  12. Oh I am so sorry. I know it is had to hear now but you will run again and without pain!!!! you will be back and you will get stronger!!! you need to heal!!!! XOXOXO

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  13. Oh Katie, I am sooooo sorry to hear this. Know that this will pass. You will heal and you will get back to doing what you love. It's only temporary. Hugs my friend. xoxo

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    1. Thank you so much Sue. I am SO glad it's only temporary. xoxo

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  14. Awe Katie. I'm so sorry. You are allowed to be sad, mad, upset .. the list goes on. It's okay to mourn the loss of your running season. Don't let anybodies, "It could be worse" take that away from you. This is your reality and it's okay to be sad about it. With that being said. Focus on your healing. I always find that running makes it incredibly difficult to eat right and lose weight. If that's still one of your goals then you could look at this as an opportunity to do that. The fitness will come back. But damn that sucks and I'm sorry for you. I'll be wishing for a speedy recovery.

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    1. Kerry, you have no idea how much I needed to hear this. Thank you.
      That's one thing I thought, now I can actually lose this weight! ♥

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  15. I'm so sorry you got bad news!!! Maybe you can do biking and swimming and come back as a bad ass triathlete!! No matter what, you are a runner and always will be-you will get back to it.

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    1. Thanks girl! I'm thinking I just may get into tri's!

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  16. I'm sorry that you are injured and unable to run for a while. It may seem like a long time right now but you will be back to running before you know it. Stay positive and enjoy some bike riding and other adventures in the mean time.

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    1. I do hope this time goes by fast. I am thankful I can still do other things though! Thanks David.

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  17. Oh dear I am so sorry to hear that! Injuries are awful! I had back surgery and it was the pits, hopefully it will give you time to do something else really positive and you can come back even stronger. I am so sorry though it really does suck! Be as cranky and upset as you need! Xoxox

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    1. That is my plan- to come back even stronger! Thanks Jess. xoxo

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